“Get your bearings — always think water safety”. That’s what Dublin Port harbourmaster Capt Michael McKenna is urging sailors, anglers, kayakers, windsurfers, kitesurfers, paddleboarders, swimmers and jetski users to remember on the lower reaches of the Liffey and out into Dublin Bay.

Actor and comedian Darren Conway has been enlisted for the port’s water safety campaign, which coincides with UN World Drowning Prevention Day this weekend.

In an interview with Wavelengths, Capt McKenna explains how it came about, and welcomes the increase in and activity on the water in recent months.

The campaign outlines eight steps (listed below) for water users to remember, starting with planning a voyage and checking weather, wind, and tides.

Dublin Port's new water safety flyer

Dublin Port is handling up to 50 ship movements a day, and so Capt Mc Kenna urges craft seeking to cross shipping channels to call up the port’s vessel traffic system (VTS) on VHF channel 12.

VTS can advise the leisure craft as to when it is safe to cross the channel – and can also advise ships arriving and leaving to look out for smaller craft, he explains.

The benefits are two-fold. Kayaks and small white yachts or paddleboarders on a breezy day can be difficult to spot, he says.

“And the person on a smaller leisure craft has a much shorter horizon,” he explains.

If in a kayak or on a board, “you can’t yet see the ship coming over the horizon and it might be on top of you in six minutes,” he says.

“Please don’t be shy to call – VTS will be delighted with the call,” he says.

Compact VHF radios in waterproof pouches are a good investment for smaller craft users, he says.

Capt McKenna also reminds people in recreational craft to wear personal flotation devices (PFDs) at all times.

The PFD is no use in the boot of a car, he says, and he appeals to crew on larger yachts to remember this too.

“Isn’t it great to see so many people out on the water,” he adds.

You can listen to him on Wavelengths below

Dublin Port’s eight safety steps, which apply to anyone on the water right around the coastline, are:

1. Plan your voyage: check the wind, weather and tide.
2. Tell someone where you are going and your time of arrival/return.
3. Wear a personal flotation device.
4. Ensure your safety equipment is working, including VHF radio for boat users.
5. Familiarise yourself with the location of the shipping lanes in Dublin Port.
6. Keep a sharp lookout for other boats by sight and by sound, and radar if you have one.
7. Call VTS on VHF Channel 12 to get traffic updates and permission to cross the shipping channel, or traffic routing schemes, at Dublin Port.
8. In an emergency, call the Coast Guard on VHF Ch 16 or phone 112.

More information is on dublinport.ie

Dublin Port Company has today reported trading figures for the second quarter of 2021 and for the first half of the year.

Following a weak first quarter, (when volumes declined by -15.2% in the first three months after Brexit), there was a +13.1% increase to 9.0 million gross tonnes in Dublin Port’s volumes for the second quarter of 2021 compared to the same period in 2020. After six months, volumes are now only ‑2.1% behind last year.

Imports from April to June increased strongly by +20.3% to 5.4 million gross tonnes while exports grew by 3.7% to 3.5 million gross tonnes.

Unitised trade (Ro-Ro and Lo-Lo) accounted for 84% of all cargo volumes in the quarter and the number of trailers and containers combined increased by +16.5% to 374,000 units. Within this, Ro‑Ro increased by +12.4% to 253,000 units while Lo‑Lo grew by 26.2% to 121,000 units (equivalent to 220,000 TEU).

The strong growth in the second quarter brings Dublin Port’s unitised volumes (Ro-Ro and Lo-Lo) to 692,000 units for the first half of the year, +1.6% ahead of 2020.

As a sign of increased economic activity, new vehicle imports in the second quarter more than doubled to 22,000 units and Bulk Liquid imports (mostly petroleum products) increased by +34.4% to 969,000 tonnes.

Imports and exports of Bulk Solid commodities grew by +22.3% to 474,000 tonnes in the three months from April to June.

Passenger and tourist volumes on ferries also showed signs of growth with passenger numbers (including HGV drivers) ahead by +41.0% to 125,000 and tourist vehicles up by +26.0% to 30,000 in the quarter.

Although volumes recovered strongly during the second quarter of 2021, cargo throughput in the first half of the year is still behind where it was before Brexit and pre-pandemic.

While volumes after six months are down by just -2.1% compared to 2020, they are -12.7% lower compared to the record levels of 2019. Within the overall volume figures, unitised trade is still -7.4% lower than it was two years ago.

Commenting on the Q2 2021 figures, Dublin Port’s Chief Executive, Eamonn O’Reilly, said:

“As each month goes by, the negative impact of the exceptionally weak start to the year post Brexit is being reduced. In the circumstances, a decline of just -2.1% after six months is not too bad a performance. However, we remain nearly -13% behind where we were in the record year of 2019.

“The effects of Brexit on the pattern of trade through Dublin Port are now becoming clearer with very strong growth of 40% on Ro-Ro and Lo-Lo services to Continental European ports compared to a decline of -19% on services with ports in Great Britain. As a result, our unitised volumes are now split 50/50 between GB ports and ports in Continental Europe. Before Brexit, GB ports accounted for almost two-thirds.

“Border inspections on imports from GB are operating very efficiently with no queuing or significant delays. On average only three trailers are being called for some form of physical inspection on each ferry that arrives. While volumes on services from Holyhead are some way behind where they were last year, there are clear signs that the landbridge is being re-established and we anticipate the steady recovery we are seeing in GB Ro-Ro volumes to continue.

“With much higher growth on direct services to Continental Europe, the proportion of unitised loads which are driver accompanied has dropped from 23% to just 17% in the first half of the year. This effect - taken together with the loss of 14.6 hectares (20 football pitches) for border inspection facilities – is putting increased pressure on port capacity, particularly in the western end of the port where works are continuing to complete Ireland’s largest Ro-Ro freight terminal. This is due to come into operation in the first half of next year.

“With long-term growth trends beginning to re-emerge, we anticipate a return to record levels of throughput by 2023. The long-term planning to provide additional port capacity for future growth never stops and we have recently commenced pre-application consultation with An Bord Pleanála for the 3FM Project, the third and final Masterplan project required to bring Dublin Port to its ultimate capacity by 2040. We aim to lodge a planning application for this project in 2023.”

Dublin Port Company (DPC) has today launched a new water safety awareness campaign supported by Water Safety Ireland (WSI) to help promote the safe, responsible use of Dublin Bay for leisure and recreation this summer.

Both Dublin Port Company and Water Safety Ireland have observed an increase in the number of people enjoying water-based sports and activities in the surroundings of Dublin Bay and Dublin Port, many for the first time. Unfortunately, some have also found themselves in potentially dangerous situations on the water requiring the guidance of Dublin Port crews to keep them clear of the shipping lanes.

Dublin Port’s campaign is aimed at the growing number of leisure boat users on the water and also those venturing out for kayaking, paddle boarding, jet-skiing and sea-swimming with the arrival of warmer temperatures and continued easing of lockdown restrictions. 

(Above and below) Dublin Port’s new Water Safety Flyer

Supported by new radio, digital and social media advertising, the campaign’s message encourages anyone planning a trip on the water to “get their bearings – always think water safety”. The message is also reinforced outdoors on a billboard at the entrance to Dublin Port.

Members of the city’s established boat and water sports clubs will already be very familiar with the dos and don’ts of crossing Dublin Bay, navigating the shipping lanes at Dublin Port or enjoying the River Liffey. However, DPC also recognises that many others taking to the water may not be aware of basic safety regulations and practices intended to keep everyone safe.

Dublin Port Harbour Master Captain Michael McKenna explains, “We have seen how quickly someone can get into a potentially dangerous situation on the water, such as being unaware that they have entered the shipping channel, passing too close to ships, not calling “VTS Dublin” on VHF Channel 12 for permission to cross, or not having a working VHF radio on board. It can be a very frightening and dangerous experience if you are not familiar with the water. We want to get the message out about the basic precautions that can help make every trip much safer.” 

As part of the campaign, DPC has created a starter’s guide to basic safety etiquette on the water, including a new map showing a simplified version of the shipping lanes at Dublin Port where permission to cross is mandatory for all leisure craft users. This information, and more, is available at www.dublinport.ie/water-safety

Dublin Port Harbour Master, Captain Michael McKenna, said; “Dublin Bay and the River Liffey are for everyone to enjoy. We want people to have fun on the water, but our number one priority is safety. We are encouraging people to always think water safety. More than 17,000 ship movements in and out of Dublin Port every year equates to almost 50 each day. There is a huge variety in the size and type of ships sharing the water with the city’s boat and yacht communities, sailing groups and sports clubs. Everyone, but especially those who are new or inexperienced, can take some simple safety precautions to help keep themselves, and everyone else on the water, safe.”

John Leech, Chief Executive Officer, Water Safety Ireland, said; “It is everyone’s responsibility to take a proactive approach to personal safety on the water, whether that’s on the waters of Dublin Bay and Port, or further afield. This summer, as people take advantage of the many beautiful coastal areas on offer, the advice has never been more relevant.

Take the time to inform yourself of the basic safety measures you can take. Having that understanding and awareness creates confidence on the water. We know from experience that you are more likely to protect yourself and others when you are aware of the risks involved, and how to avoid them in the first place.”

Jet Skis and Personal Watercraft (PWC)

Jet ski and PWC users are reminded to adhere to the 6 knots speed limit when within 60 m of a pier, jetty, slipway, mooring, shore or another vessel and 120 m of a swimmer or dive flag. Freestyling is not permitted within 200m of swimmers, or the shoreline.

Get your walking boots on and experience the rich culture Dublin’s city port has to offer with a new self-guided walking tour booklet.

The fantastic guide to Dublin’s Deep Sea Port, from Dublin North East Inner City and The Five Lamps Arts Festival, contains beautiful illustrations by John D Ruddy.

From Dublin Port Company HQ at Port Centre to the No 11 Liffey Ferry and all the areas between, this wonderful publication tells the fascinating history of Dublin’s deep sea port and its links to the local area.

Dublin Port Company has 500 printed copies available for postage, and the guide is also available to download as a PDF. For more details see the Dublin Port Archive website HERE.

For the first time, Dublin Port Company has illuminated The Diving Bell on Sir John Rogerson's Quay in the colours of the rainbow for the Dublin Pride Festival, in keeping with this year’s theme of Community.

The Diving Bell is one of a number of city landmarks highlighting the Festival this June.

A Virtual Pride Parade will take place tomorrow, Saturday, June 26th, as part of a full-day entertainment programme. 

Dublin Port headquarters flies the Pride flag. A Virtual Pride Parade will take place tomorrow Photo: Conor McCabe

This year marks the 150th Anniversary of the inaugural use of Dublin Port's pioneering diving bell, and Thursday 27th May will see the first of three 40-minute online lectures (the other two are on 3rd June and 10th June) organised by the Port's Heritage & Communications Group to celebrate and detail the city-port's remarkable expansion in the latter half of the 19th Century.

Much of it was made possible by the ingenuity of the Harbour Engineer, the magnificently named Bindon Blood Stoney (1828-1909), who was of an Offaly family. His inventiveness was such that his development of the North Quays really was award-winning – he received the highly-regarded Telford Medal for the creative work done here, using his own-designed diving bell (it was built in Drogheda in 1866) and enormous concrete blocks built on site.

The Dublin Port Diving Bell with its purpose-designed service vessel, ready to go to work 150 years ago. The whole setup was so ahead of its time that it remained in use until the 1960s.

At the time, it was all state-of-the-art cutting edge work on a major scale, and in the inaugural session, Dr Ron Cox of Trinity College will set Bindon Stoney's engineering achievements in context. The two subsequent talks will see Dublin Port Chief Executive Eamonn O'Reilly exploring the vibrant links between the port and the city on Thursday, June 3rd, and then on Thursday 10th June, Jim Kelleher – head of Special Projects at Dublin Port – will explain the intriguing details of the Diving Bell itself.

Further information and registration details here

The Séan O’Casey Community Centre in Dublin’s East Wall officially opened its new garden for seniors to the public this week, featuring a new marquee and planting sponsored by Dublin Port Company. Under current Covid-19 restrictions, the redesigned garden will be able to accommodate up to 15 seniors per day for activities such as bingo, knitting, pool, snooker, draughts, wellness talks and live music and dancing.

The Centre, which first opened in 2009, is an important resource to the people of East Wall and prior to the pandemic, offered a Senior Citizen Daycare service, providing four-course meals for 85 seniors, with mental wellbeing and physical activities for up to 100 seniors, five days a week. Throughout Covid-19 it has continued to provide a Meals on Wheels service for East Wall’s senior citizens, but opportunities for older members of the community to come together and socialise have been severely curtailed. It is hoped the garden will offer a safe space for familiar faces to be reacquainted this summer.

Commenting on the opening of the Garden, the Centre’s Chairperson Willie Dwyer said; “The older people in the community of East Wall are very special and have sacrificed so much in the last year. When Covid happened, we put our heads together to see what we could do for them and we came up with this garden. It is important to give them a safe space to get out of the house a few times a week. We have not seen a lot of our senior community in the last year and we want to encourage as many of them as possible to come back. We want to get the word out to older people in our community that the Centre is open again, and that everyone is welcome.

“It has been a tough year but occasions like this give us optimism for the future. We are all looking forward to getting back to offering a full range of services to the community of East Wall again. None of this would have been possible without our sponsors who have worked tremendously well together to get this garden up and running for our senior citizens, so I would like to thank Dublin Port Company, Collen Construction, the Inner-City Trust Fund and Dublin City Council for making this happen.”

Dublin Port Company has had a long-standing relationship with the Centre and the Port’s Heritage Director, Lar Joye, and Edel Currie, Community Engagement Manager, were in attendance to cut the ribbon as the garden welcomed its first visitors.

Lar Joye said; “Dublin Port Company is delighted to be involved in creating a dedicated garden for older citizens in our community as part of our long-running commitment to the Seán O’Casey Community Centre and the people of East Wall. We hope that this new facility provides an outlet for seniors who have been isolated for the last year to come and socialise with each other again. It’s a hub for conversation, story-telling, activity and entertainment that we hope older people will enjoy for many more years to come.

“Well done to Willie and all the staff at the Séan O’Casey Community Centre who have driven this project from an idea through to completion. We all look forward to seeing it used to its full potential when the circumstances allow.”

The Irish Nautical Trust has launched the “Liffey Sweeper”, a new environmental vessel designed to collect large amounts of non-natural debris such as plastic, cans and bottles from the city’s waterways.

The newest addition to Dublin’s nautical fleet is part of the River Liffey Cleaning Project, the brainchild of Irish Nautical Trust Director Jimmy Murray, whose ambition is to remove all floating debris from the Liffey, the Dodder and the Tolka estuary.

“This is an ecological and environmental development research project which has been designed over the last two years to help prevent the accumulation of all non-natural debris such as plastics, cans and disposable coffee cups, and to stop it getting into the sea and the Dublin Bay biosphere, where it affects marine wildlife”, explains Jimmy Murray.

The Liffey Sweeper will initially operate four days a week, sweeping from the upper part of the River Liffey at Butt Bridge to the mouth of the River and Clontarf area, including the basins and all the shipping berths within Dublin Port.

Once lifted from the water, debris is separated and sorted into designated recycling bins and the balance of the assorted materials Photos: Conor McCabe

Fitted with a deep cage, the Liffey Sweeper is able to catch a range of material from the water, including floating plastic and debris just below the surface. Once lifted from the water, debris is separated and sorted into designated recycling bins and the balance of the assorted materials, i.e. that which cannot be recycled, is removed by a licenced contractor for treatment before disposal at the Covanta Waste to Energy Treatment Plant on Poolbeg, while any organic matter collected is returned to the water.

Fitted with a deep cage, the Liffey Sweeper is able to catch a range of material from the water Photo: Conor McCabe

Its launch follows a successful grant of €180,000 from the Dublin Waste to Energy Community Gain Projects Grant Scheme which enabled the Irish Nautical Trust to purchase the former environmental vessel from the UK. The pilot project is further supported involving collaboration between the Irish Nautical Trust, Dublin Port Company, University College Dublin, School of Biology and Environmental Science, Dublin Waste to Energy/Covanta, and Dublin City Council. The Irish Nautical Trust is currently part of Google’s Employment Task Force which works with a wide range of local community groups and has also approached Google as a potential partner for the project.

The launch coincides with Earth Day 2021, which continues its focus on the ongoing climate emergency, with events taking place virtually due to Covid-19 between April 20th-22nd. This year’s theme of “Restore Our Earth” sees Jimmy and the Liffey Sweeper urging people to leave no trace while enjoying the amenities of Dublin Bay.

Operating four days a week, the new vessel will sweep from the upper part of the River Liffey at Butt Bridge to the mouth of the River and Clontarf area, including the basins and all the shipping berths within Dublin Port, preventing debris from reaching the sea and the Dublin Bay Biosphere Photo: Conor McCabe

“We’ve noticed more disposable coffee cups, plastic bottles and food packaging appearing in the River during lockdown. With bank holiday weekends and the summer months approaching, I would really encourage people to plan ahead and be prepared to bring your rubbish home. Everyone’s contribution adds up and can make a difference”, said Jimmy Murray.

“We call it the river that never sleeps. Every six hours, the tide changes and even while we are asleep, whatever is coming down the Liffey will float down and out to sea or else get caught up around port berths, slipways, steps and other areas where it can get trapped. Our goal is to prevent that from happening by gathering enough data on the debris in the water to put together a programme to prevent any debris entering the Dublin Bay Biosphere.”

“This project is badly needed,” Jimmy concludes. “The Liffey is an extension of the streets; a lot of the waste that is on the city’s streets ends up in the river, whether it is thrown in or blown in by nature and being carried out to sea. This project is a win for the environment, the beaches, the wildlife and the local communities, in terms of cleaning them up and hopefully creating employment with an expanded programme in the near future.”

Dublin Port Company has today reported trading figures for the first quarter of 2021.

Following a strong final quarter in 2020 (when volumes grew by +7.8% in the run-up to Brexit), there was a ‑15.2% decline to 7.8 million gross tonnes in Dublin Port’s volumes for the first three months of 2021 compared to same period in 2020.

Imports from January to March fell by ‑14.4% to 4.7 million gross tonnes and exports declined by ‑16.6% to 3.1 million gross tonnes.

Unitised trade (Ro-Ro and Lo-Lo) accounted for 82% of all cargo volumes in the quarter and the number of trailers and containers combined fell by ‑11.7% to 318,000 units. Within this, there was a very large decline of ‑20.1% in Ro‑Ro to 204,000 units. This was partly offset by an increase in Lo‑Lo of 9.0% to 114,000 units (equivalent to 206,000 TEU).

Ro-Ro 

While overall Ro-Ro volumes were down by ‑20.1% to 204,000 units, trends were very different on Irish Sea routes to GB compared to direct routes to Continental Europe:

• Ro-Ro to and from ports in France, Belgium and the Netherlands increased by +25.5% to 52,000 units.
• Ro-Ro to and from GB ports fell by ‑29.0% to 152,000 units.

Dublin Port Ro-Ro Units

For the 318,000 units of Ro-Ro and Lo-Lo combined, volumes are now split 50 / 50 between ports in GB and ports in Continental Europe and beyond:

• Unitised trade with GB ports declined by ‑29.2% to 160,000 units
• Trade with ports in the EU (and elsewhere) increased by +17.9% to 158,000 units.

Elsewhere in Dublin Port’s unitised trade, imports of new trade vehicles declined by ‑12.6% to 27,000 units.

Due to continuing reduced transport demand in the economy, Bulk Liquid imports of petroleum products were back by ‑23.4% to 0.9 million tonnes.

Bulk Solids (including agri‑feed products, ore concentrates and cement products) finished the quarter +9.9% ahead at 0.5m tonnes.

Passenger & tourism volumes

Outside of the cargo side of Dublin Port’s business, the pandemic continued to suppress passenger and tourism volumes. Passenger numbers on ferries (including HGV drivers) declined by ‑63.2% to 83,000 while tourist vehicles declined by ‑74.3% to 17,000.

Commenting on the Q1 2021 figures, Dublin Port’s Chief Executive, Eamonn O’Reilly, said: “The first quarter of 2021 was very weak with overall cargo volumes back by 15.2% compared to the first quarter of 2020. This is mainly because of Brexit. However, it is too early yet to say what the long-term effects of Brexit will be and whether the declines we have seen so far in 2021 will persist at the same level for the rest of the year.

“With two ferry lines (Irish Ferries and P&O) now operating services both from Dublin Port to GB and across the English Channel from Dover to Calais, we are optimistic that the landbridge will re-establish itself as a fast and cost-effective option for the movement of time-sensitive goods to and from Continental Europe in the months ahead.

“The dislocation of a lot of volume to ports in Northern Ireland is, however, worrying. Back in 1990, before the Single European Market was established, more than a third of Ro-Ro trade chose services to and from Northern Irish ports rather than use services in and out of Dublin Port. We won’t get a proper sense until later in the year as to how much of the 29% decline we have seen in GB Ro-Ro trade is due to the new border regimes and whether this dislocation will be a permanent feature for the years ahead or not.

“The only positive thing we are seeing in the figures for the first quarter is the growth of 18% in Ro-Ro and Lo-Lo volumes on direct services with Continental Europe. This confirms that the investment decisions we have been taking in recent years under Masterplan 2040 were correct. It also shows the responsiveness of the shipping market to rapidly provide the capacity needed for the changes in demand patterns which Brexit has caused.

“If we do see a sustained step change downwards in volumes on routes to GB because of Brexit, I expect that the pivoting of trade from GB to Continental Europe will, in time, re-establish the long-term growth trends we have seen in Dublin Port for many decades.”

A secretive organisation known as SFA (the Studying Feasibility Alliance) is working behind the scenes to encourage the establishment of a professional body for one of the fastest-growing business sectors in the marine and other spheres in Ireland, the lucrative world of Feasibility Studies.

It's surprising that, so far as is known, there is still no Feasibility Studies Institute in Ireland, north or south. For many decades - and particularly since the Troubles of 1969-1998 began to break out in the late 1960s - if it was felt that if an identifiable socio-economic or infrastructural problem was seen as contributing to the difficulties of the situation – both in the north and cross-border - a budget would be allocated to plan a solution, and a substantial part of that budget would be set aside for the completion of at least one Feasibility Study before going any further.

As it was realised how complex such studies could become, it sometimes became necessary to commission Feasibility Studies into how many different Feasibility Studies would be required in order to validate some major project. And in most cases, the authorities quietly hoped that in due course, the only industry to make a clearcut profit would be in architecture and construction to create appropriate archive storehouses, places where the numerous Feasibility Studies could gather dust in peace.

But despite the fact that many professional partnerships and university departments in several disciplines have made good money out of the public purse and international philanthropic funds in these ultimately intangible researches - with several individuals enjoying a glittering career in feasibility analysis – the sector has remained fragmented.

Thus it's difficult to escape the feeling that these established specialists prefer to do it in this piecemeal way, rather be in some way answerable to a central professional Feasibility Institute which could set standards, hand out internationally-recognised fellowships, and maybe even encourage the establishment of degree courses in Feasibility Studies.

But the Young Turks of the SFA think otherwise. They feel that there is a public perception that officially-commissioned Feasibility Studies are a bit of racket, and that the only way to respond is to go public, shine a spotlight on their activities, and define and clarify what they do in a way which will ultimately enable them to charge even more for their services.

The establishment or otherwise of a Feasibility Studies Institute is of special current interest to Ireland's maritime sector in its broadest sense, as two major infrastructural questions currently being analysed as matters of public interest are the general development and possible relocation of some and possibly all of the shipping functions of Dublin Port, and the other is the creation of a new Scotland to Northern Ireland link via a tunnel or a bridge, or something in between.

Dublin and its port from seaward. Unlike Sydney, Dublin is not a large natural port, but rather it's a harbour created out of a deepened river in which the entire commercial port is now on "new" land created by infill. Thus the special character of the city is in part created by the need for residential and commercial areas to share space with shipping requirements.

"Dublin Port is a tricky one for us", says an SFA spokesman. "Its administration and organisation is run in an imaginative and energetic way in which dynamic cultural interactions with the public are being created and strengthened on several fronts. Thus although some high-profile, high-powered developers and economists are arguing that the port should be moved elsewhere like some other arguably comparable ports, Dubliners will often respond that they like having a real living port in the midst of their city, and that Dublin didn't get where it is today by simply copy-catting other major ports.

But then, if we promoters of Feasiblity Studies argue that there should at least be research into possible alternative sites for the heavy work of Dublin harbour, we find that the Dublin Port authorities have got there before us anyway, with their exemplary recently-published research papers, which included carefully analysed proposals for alternative news ports for Arklow in County Wicklow, or Bremor in the far north of Fingal.

Dublin Port score double for their proposals for Bremor, as we can compare it with a nearby plan which has been released for a private-developer-supported port further north. This plan proposes new harbour breakwaters in straight lines with marked corners. When the sea is in destructive mood, it just loves clearcut corners in major breakwaters – it will chew them away in jig time.

The proposed new shipping port on the Meath coast as planned by a public-private partnership. In storm conditions, any breakwater with such clearcut corners would be especially subject to erosion

Dublin Port's longterm suggestion for an additional facility at Bremore takes full account of the Irish Sea's conditions in onshore gales.

But the Dublin Port proposal is based on curving breakwaters which are much better at repelling and absorbing the waves. So clearly theirs is a serious proposal, whereas the other has the whiff of kite-flying about it.

Thus our problem with Dublin Port is that they seem to have a very productive in-house Feasibility Studies Institute already in being. So we have to look elsewhere for a flagship project with which to launch our new Institute in style, and the North Channel Link looks to be a God-given gift".

Certainly as any regular readers of Afloat.ie will be aware, suggestions for a Trans North Channel Link from Scotland to Ireland, whether by bridge or tunnel or a combination of both, or by some sort of tube – floating or otherwise - have been coming in thick and fast, ever since British premier Boris Johnson made it a central part of his transport infrastructure upgrade policy.

As it's unlikely that any private partnership capital will become available for such a project, which is at and beyond the extremes of engineering and economic viability, several rigorous Feasibility Studies will be required into many aspects of the project and its support connections.

Fixed connections across the North Channel have to withstand the problems of storms, extremely powerful tides, exceptionally varied water depths, and the remoteness and lack of connectivity of terminals on the Scottish side, making it a very rewarding area for Feasibility Studies.

Thus the SFA feels the time was never more appropriate for the establishment of globally-recognised International Feasibility Studies Institute, and they suggest it should be located in a Dublin Docklands Office Complex in acknowledgement of the high standards already set in this area of research and study by Dublin Port.

An SFA spokeswoman explained to Afloat.ie that the only clear boundary in the area of Feasibility Studies is whether the basic funding is public or private.

"You'll probably have heard" said she, "the story of how one of the glamour high tech companies was setting up state-of-the-art "canteen" facilities for their decidedly pampered staff in their European HQ in Dublin. They retained a noted chef full-time to work on commissioning the new facility, and then seeing it through into smooth operation. When he asked what sort of budget he'd be operating within, they said there was no budget - just get it done, and we'll look after whatever it takes."

While there may be times when such flagship projects as the new Children's Hospital in Dublin, the new Airport in Berlin, and the new HS2 High Speed Rail Link in the south of England look as though they've been planned on the "whatever it takes" budgeting principle, we can be quite sure there were Feasibility Studies at different stages of each project, and one of the courses envisaged as being central to the new International Feasibilities Studies Institute is how you style your completed study. 

"We may even have a course in "Know The Psychology of the Client" says the SFA. "If it's clear that it's something of a vanity project, we hope to provide what we in the trade call the Cosmetic Feasibility Study, which looks good and businesslike, but cleverly makes almost indiscernible important provisions and reasons for major cost-over-runs.

If, however, it's a rather boring project in which no-one personally has a special interest, we can offer our attractively priced Standard Comprehensive DG Feasibility Study, which looks good, and smothers the reader in graphs and computer-generated drawings, yet the experienced assessor will immediately know that DG is not "Director General", but on the contrary is "Dust Gatherer"."

The leading members of the SFA are particularly impressed by the proposal for a floating tunnel across the North Channel put forward by Heriot-Watt University of Edinburgh. 

The Floating Tunnel for the North Channel proposed by Heriot-Watt University of Edinburgh, which might offer the advantage of being towed away for use elsewhere in calmer waters if the North Channel proves to be too rough

"It's a simple and feasible yet massive idea, put forward with style. Showing a car driving through gives it an instant credibility with which modern society can identify. And we note that realistically they propose it starts at Portpatrick on the Scottish side, but instead of going the longer distance to Larne, we would suggest they bring the western end ashore on the much nearer and uninhabited Copeland Island close north of Donaghadee, with the island providing space for the tunnel's administrative centre. Finally, we would suggest that as an additional selling point, they can say that if it doesn't work because of the exceptional roughness of the seas of the North Channel, it can always be towed away and used somewhere else to cross a calmer waterway".

It would never get built nowadays……the eccentric and much-loved Basilica de la Sagrada by Antoni Gaudi in Barcelona

The need for reasonably credible feasibility studies is growing more urgent all the time, with immediate public scrutiny of proposals through online publication, and aggressive discussion in social media. Thus the members of the SFA readily admit that two of the world's most famous and best-loved buildings, the Sydney Harbour Opera House and the Basilica de la Sagrada Familia in Barcelona, would today require extremely creative Feasibility Studies by masters of the art if they were ever going to get built at all.

"But we don't despair" say the SFA. "If we ever get the IFSI up and running, our motto will be: "We are the light at the beginning of your tunnel".

Update (April 1, noon): Thank you for reading our 2021 April Fool's yarn